Time Flew

The world was a very different place the last time I posted anything on this blog. Most importantly, my dad was still alive and in relatively decent health. He had a few of the scourges of old age like memory loss but there was no hint that in two years he would no longer be with us. I am an only child and the loss is profound, but there hasn't been much time to grieve because there are people he left behind who still need me. His brother lives in a dementia unit in a facility nearby and my mom, who lives six minutes away, needs a little help with finances, house maintenance and sometimes just companionship. They had the typical division of labor of many marriages that began in the 50's. She had no interest in the finances and he was happy to assume that role. So we have muddled our way through the year somehow without too many late charges or bounced checks. 

On the other end of life's continuum, the birth of my second grandchild has given our family something to celebrate. She and her older sister are precious beyond description, and that is a completely unbiased opinion.

Another highlight was celebrating my 60th birthday with ALL THREE of my sons in NYC this past summer. In the endlessly demanding days of their toddlerhood I would never have been able to imagine a day when gathering them all together in one place would be like the proverbial herding of cats, but turning sixty was my ace in the hole.  I love how well they get along and they let their mom be incredibly annoying with nary a grimace between them. I'm pretty sure I don't want to wait five more years to do it again!

Now in my recurring role of "Debbie Downer" there is no avoiding the yuge elephant in the room....the fact that Donald Trump was elected president. Even after a year I haven't been able to come to terms with that thought. I remember going to bed on election night pretty confident that Hillary would be our first female president and then awaking to the news. At first I was incredulous...numb. I couldn't watch any of the coverage on television. I cried off and on throughout the day. I even cried in the grocery store where many people in my conservative neck of the woods were unabashedly triumphant. Still, as bad as it seemed I clinged to the hope that Trump might actually try to drain the swamp or follow through on any number of things he promised would make America great, but only a year into his tenure he has shown that just when we think we've hit bottom he can dig the hole even deeper. If this were a screenplay instead of our reality, the superhero would swoop in, spin the earth backwards and all would be right with the world. Instead, it has been a year of harsh realities that threaten to crush our spirit. My only hope is that there are many good people out there who have been shocked out of their complacency. We need to pull EACH OTHER up by our bootstraps, lock arms, kneel, and whatever else it takes to show the world that we have the humility and strength of character to repair the damage. To a new year!

Will 2016 Be The Year?

According to 2015 actuarial tables, I have about 27.6 years left to finish cleaning my basement. You see, I have been talking about cleaning it for almost that long, so I’m justifiably skeptical about the chances of success. In fact, I have several hundred saved emails providing hard evidence that I have been complaining to anyone who will listen about my messy house since 1994.

I find it exceedingly easy to put daunting projects on the back burner in the day-to-day flurry of bill paying, laundry and Instagram posting. And make no mistake, my basement is a project of monumental proportions.

All evidence to the contrary, I am completely obsessed with organizing and purging the clutter that has taken over much of the square footage in our home. When I think about the enormity of the job, I “google” de-cluttering and for a brief moment, there is hope. But when I head downstairs to confront the beast, I allow myself to get distracted by writing a blog post or folding laundry or moving furniture around.

The amount of energy I expend stressing about clutter and dreaming about dumpsters is a testament to how debilitating it can be. Of course life goes on in a messy house, but drowning in clutter can turn into treading water through life and that’s why I’m going to work on the basement as soon as I un-load the dishwasher!

Are You Ready?

December 4, 2013

Please don't start with the questions….where have you been? ….you promised to start writing more often…how did I end up here,  I was looking for a recipe….

I'm all out of excuses, so let's just begin…

I've been bemoaning the fact, along with everyone else, that we've had one less week between Thanksgiving and Christmas this year. Less time to decorate, to shop, to get in shape, to write that children's book. 

My dirty little secret is that it doesn't matter how much time I have to prepare for the holidays. You will find me scrambling at the last minute whether I start two months or two weeks before Christmas. Instead of trying to change this behavior, I'm thinking it's time to embrace it. Why not intentionally do nothing until a week before Christmas? Many people perform better under pressure. Maybe I'm one of those people? I can still commiserate with everyone who isn't ready for the holidays without revealing that I've consolidated my angst into a mere 7 days!

I have a friend who shares my passion for procrastination. Her Christmas cards began to arrive late a couple of years ago, at which point she finally just started sending out New Year's cards. Not everyone can pull this off, nor should they. If everyone followed suit, we could literally end up celebrating Christmas in July! 

I honestly believe that Christmas has nothing to do with "things"… it's about being thankful, about spending time with family, about sitting in front of a fire wearing your Snuggie, glass of wine in hand. 

Despite this, when it's December 23rd and you realize that you forgot to buy the stocking stuffers or you didn't buy eggs for the traditional breakfast quiche, you know what you are truly thankful for. Giant Eagle has everything you need and it's open all night! 

Cartoon Courtesy of grtoons

Call me Meemz!

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What is the significance of March 1, 2012? It just so happens to be the last post I 

wrote on this site. With a huge sense of gratitude to my 10 followers, most of 
whom probably just forgot they were following, I am venturing out again to 
revive this blog. 

If I imagine trying to recap the events since I last wrote, I am overcome by a 
most intense desire for a nap, so let's just start fresh with one big change in 
my life. Her name is Adeline and she is my first granddaughter. She is only
two weeks old, and I've only held her little swaddled self twice. I plan to 
make up for lost time when I go back to visit my son and his wife next week. 

I'm not really a "planner" but in preparation for my visit I have been practicing
sitting and rocking and staring. I know there are other duties I may be called 
on to perform, but that's how I plan to fill most of the time that I'm there. It's 
quite apropos that I'll be there on Valentine's day, because a new baby is the
best symbol I can think of to represent love. 

With your encouragement and support, I believe we can make this the year my
blog receives enough hits to allow me to work from home!



"Daughter" by Loudon Wainwright III - 
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lVam-fshUgw

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Cell Phone Jingle....I mean Jungle!

A tech savvy friend who updates her equipment regularly, gave me her old IPhone recently and I went to the AT&T store to see if I could use it without signing up for the $30.00/month data plan. Not surprisingly, the answer was an unapologetic "no".  I should have asked why, but I doubt that any answer to that question would have been satisfactory. 


I am an inveterate texter, and although I manage perfectly well with predictive text on my little antique of a phone, I wouldn't mind using a phone with the much more efficient qwerty keyboard. I looked around at the keyboard phones that could be used WITHOUT a data plan and the prices seemed pretty reasonable, until I looked at the fine print. In large print the price was $49.99 but in fine print on the sign next to it, they explained that the lower price included a two year contract renewal. If you wanted to buy the phone outright, the price morphed into a whopping $249.99. What diabolical scheme was at work here? **See rant below** 


Odds are that I will continue using my current cell phone provider for two more years anyway, so why resist the temptation of a new phone? It was my symbolic attempt to take a stand against the tyranny of those holding us all hostage. Faced with a groundswell of opposition to said tyranny I believe we could effect change. The challenge is that as we embrace each new incarnation of technology, anything resembling a groundswell becomes a trickle.


Cockeyed optimist that I am, I talked with the sales associate about ways to lower my bill. Any change to my plan that resulted in savings in one area would cause trouble in another. I could save a modest amount by lowering my minutes from 700 to 500 per month but I would then be vulnerable to expensive overages as well as a more expensive level of text messaging. I had flashbacks to first year Algebra!


**Walking out of the store, I drifted into a dream-like state as I imagined the back room in which these bizarre and arbitrary rules are formulated. A handful of people were brainstorming about how to wring the most money out of their customers without the customers noticing. I thought of the surveys they must have conducted with people in their target demographic about how much they would be willing to pay for things like unlimited text messaging or data plans before feeling as though they had been screwed.


The contract parameters that my imaginary executives came up with required a graduate school level of math proficiency but no one seemed to mind because they were, after all, getting a $249.99 phone for only $49.99! My mind then meandered to a scene from the 1976 movie "Network" in which Peter Finch exhorts people to stick their heads out their windows and yell, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not gonna' take it anymore!"  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=WINDtlPXmmE&feature=related


As Richard Buckminster Fuller once said....“You never change things by fighting the existing reality. To change something, build a new model that makes the existing model obsolete.” 


Here's to change!


Copyright KKR March 2012